BabyCenter sends me out these helpful little messages every month or so for Carter & Lilah and the age they are at during that month, and now for the new pregnancy each week. I actually look forward to getting them since they have lots of good info packed into each email.
However, the one I got today for Carter's age I'm not so sure I agree with. Here's a portion of it:
"You're so proud of your angel's burgeoning vocabulary — until words like "poopie head," " stupid," "dummy," and worse creep in. "Bad" words are all around your child: They hear grownups cursing at traffic, pick up foul language from TV, and trade exciting words (the ones that seem to get a rise out of Mom or Dad) with playmates and siblings. Alliterative silly words ("poopy doopy") are favorites because they are so fun to say and hear. The quickest way to make this kind of language disappear is to ignore it. If you make a fuss, you're only showing them how powerful certain words are, which makes them want to say them all the more."
I'm just not sure if this technique will work with my little guy. He, and frankly most every kid I know, will just continue to repeat the "words" more and more loudly until they get a reaction of some kind.
Or maybe I just hang out with and birth "that" kind of kid.....
Today we were driving up the mountain and this pokey car just kept hanging out in the lane that was ending. I slowed down to let them merge but they were basically about to drive their Buick off the side of the mountain and land smack on top of the city of Trenton.
Anyway, I had pretty much come to a complete stop by this point to see what this Buick was going to do when she finally swerved like there was no tomorrow over into my lane.
I said, "You Big Dummy, watch where you're going." I said it really calmly, because I wasn't surprised. I knew she was either gonna swerve or go airborn.
Anyway, turns out I'm the big dummy, because I spent the rest of the drive home, 15 minutes or so explaining to my son what a "big dummy" is.
Which is kinda hard.
Thanks a lot Fred Sanford!
To ignore or not to ignore?.....that is the question!
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6 years ago
8 comments:
Been there done that. When my kids were not saying the right words I used the James Dobson approach (which he recommend for whining, you say "I am sorry can you repeat that my ears can not hear thoes words, can you say it so my ears can hear the right words?"
It worked when they were little, now as a teenagers...um not so much.
Ha.
We do have to be careful what we say. You never know when those little ears are listening and they usually are!! Talking, timeout or a good ole fashion Sand Mtn. whoopin'are always otions. Different kids take different punishments. I had one that would start to cry when you started talking to her and one who needed a few of those SMW's. While you want to do the right thing, just know things are going to happen and you live through it!
OMG, Maddie is going through this sooooo much right now.. unfortunately since she is in daycare, she learns a whole lot more than I can even imagine of the bad stuff...so right now anyways, we're punishing her by time-outs and spankins' but I'm not sure that she really cares.. she's so hard to get through to, sometimes! But ignoring the issue is not an option for me!
Fasten your seatbelt, it only gets worse:) lol!!!
Is "big dummy" bad? lol!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love Sanford and Son!
I'm right there with you sister! Cohen and Taegan go to the same day care Maddie goes to that Beth mentioned. And it is a struggle everyday to keep my two from talkin ugly! Sometimes they don't even realize what they are saying they are just repeating something they heard. For instance, Taegan came home one day this week and was saying someone called her stupid at school. So, she says that stupid is a bad word, then in the next couple of sentences she tells Cohen he is a crack hole. What?? A crack hole? I'm assuming she meant bu**hole, but where did she even hear that! Ugghh! Anyway, I feel your pain. If you figure out the secret to them not talking ugly, let me know!
OH ME, I AM IN THE SAME BOAT! THE WHOLE WAY TO FLORIDA AND HOME WE GOT TO HEAR ALL KINDS OF NAMES CALLED. THANK GOODNESS THEY WERE NOT REALLY BAD BUT SILLY ONES LIKE POOPY AND ADDING WORDS TO POOPY. THE WORDS REALLY MADE NO SENSE BUT I AM SURE ONE DAY THEY WILL. LOL
THEY LIKE TO STICK THEIR TOUNGS OUT AND ROLL THEIR EYES TOO. OH ME, WHAT DO YOU DO? I HAVE TRIED ALL APPROACHES. JUST HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT ON YOUR OWN AND SEE WHAT WORKS TO GET THEM TO STOP.
JUST WAIT UNTIL CARTER IS IN SCHOOL AND THE OTHER TWO ARE BEING TAUGHT BY HIM ALL THE NO NO WORDS.
THAT IS WHAT I AM GOING THROUGH NOW.
Congratulations on the new little one! I love babies and am thrilled when someone I "know" is expecting.
Totally know what you mean about the language. And, no, ignoring them is not an option. We start with explaining why that word or phrase is not acceptable and then move on to stronger discipline if needed, but we make sure they know why we don't use "those" words first. Many times children simply try out new words and phrases without knowing their meaning. They don't know they've said something "bad" until we react. Granted it's always harder to explain why we shouldn't say something when they heard it from us first.
Keep up the God work,
Lori
It's hard to know what type of punshment works best when they are 3 or younger. We always spanked Hayden but other ways work well also. When he was older (and still do now) I would sit him down and look up scripture in his bible and make him read it to me and then ask him what he thought that it meant. Like......Why he can't lie or Why he can't steal.......ect. That's just a suggestion for the future. It has always helped us.
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